Long dark roads

I know that in some aspects we all have long dark roads in our lives that are not lit until the light needed for the journey is necessary.  I have several roads in my journey that have the potential to be rather scary but I just keep reminding myself that the darkness always gives way to the light in due time. Some of those dark paths seem long overdue right now for some illumination and I keep hoping that as the road moves into the future the reality and light that are added will dissipate the fear of the unknown in my mind.

Tallit Fringes

I bought this tallit in Israel several years ago.  It is the smallest size undergarment they make for a child.  I am excited that I will be moving these fringes to my very own prayer shawl soon and learning like a child the depths of the meaning of my faith.  

Wedding Rings- Goodbye

It was a very painful and angry day the day my marriage was evidently permanently over.  I removed my wedding ring and knew it would never mean the same thing it had ever meant to me in the past.  Months later I found my spouses ring tossed aside in an unlikely place for such a symbol and realized that it never meant to him what mine had meant to me.  Today I decided it was time to put them to rest in some place of respect but none the less bury their significance as a symbol of a historical past devoid of the emotion and meaning they should hold.  I grieve only for a moment and set them in a quiet hiding place for memories sake only.

Quiet Refuge...

I have had a great hope fulfilled today.  I applied to the Upper division of the BSN Program at UNC Charlotte this fall in order to complete my four year degree.    It has been a two year process to get prerequisites completed.  There were nearly 275 applicants this semester for  50 open spots and 25 waiting list seats for the spring semester.  The letters of acceptance and denial were mailed on Friday and hit mailboxes over the weekend and today.  I was excited to receive mine today after work.  It is not without a great deal of gratitude for people like Cathy Crawford and my friend Joan Pennington that I have made it this far at all.    So when the letter came today and I could celebrate my acceptance it was them I wanted to tell first and thank.  It was they that have supported me when it has gotten hard and long and scary and who have rejoiced with me with every milestone.  I am more grateful to them than words can express.

Close of Shabbat Moon

 This Shabbos was different than all others I have experienced.  At sundown I went out to take a photo and to view the moon instead of performing Havdalah.  I needed to see the light of the creation in the sky, to see the shabbos leave in the natural world.  I needed to smell the fresh air and feel the darkness falling.  I will miss her this week....

Contrasts

This shot caught my eye because of the contrast in color and texture.  It also made me think.  It seemed really out of place here at the beginning of fall.  The hardwood tree in the background (of which you see  only the bark of its truck) had brilliantly colored leaves falling constantly from its branches in the Autumn winds.  It was going dormant for the winter.  Yet at its base there were these lush green leaves growing from this fragile looking plant with berries growing heavily between them.  It was not an evergreen type plant like a holly so it made me start to consider the nature of this plant.  It had to have a purpose in the pre-frost season because its leaves will never survive a single heavily frosted evening.  This plant was prolific and fruitful yet a not a winter fruit bloomer.  It was meant to feed something ... maybe birds, maybe small animal, maybe insects before the frost!  I feel like Hashem is doing that for me right now too.  I think the season of darkness is still yet to come for me and He continues to feed me through this project, my friends, and my job right now.  I am thankful for the contrast.  I am thankful for His provision.  I am thankful for this season. May I remember His faithfulness now when the darkness comes in the deepest of winter and may I keep  it stored up as faith when my heart is surrounded in that darkness.

Mourning

Shai came to Saluda, SC  from a ranch in the heart of Israel to stay with Henry and Joan to learn to rope.  He stayed for 3 months and met many new people.  I am still in shock upon learning of his accidental death in Israel this week.  I had so hoped to meet him the next time in Israel on the ranch where he worked.  I grieve for his family and for all of us that came to know him.