Life seems like it is being totally recreated in every day that goes by for me lately. Everything that I have ever known is now strangely different.  Many things are remarkably better and others are just not the same -being neither negative or positively changed.  My life feel like it is all about renewal.  I need more than ever just to  have an outlet to express my thoughts and creative side and to learn to be fully me...  in a safe and private way.  This is not a public blog.  I have only invited a few people to even look.  I value their insight, their faith and their honesty.  I also value their ability to tell me like it is when I need to hear it most.

 Some days I feel excited and hopeful about the future and other days I am experiencing profound pain and grief.  Loneliness and frustration seem  my all too frequent companions and I know that it must be tiresome to deal with.  I am living day by day wondering some of those days if I really even want to make it.  That scares me a little bit more than I care to admit.